As clouds float by

Laying on the tailgate of my pickup, in the parking lot of the apartment, I gaze into the twilight sky.  The gentle breeze is softly blowing low billowy clouds across the sky and four stars are visible with all the city light pollution. I notice the the hue of the clouds is a bright orange.  Somewhere there is a gorgeous Texas sunset happening.  Somewhere beyond my line of sight mother nature has created in splendor a colorful farewell to today.  A hot tear escapes my eye and runs across my cheek, landing in the collar of my t-shirt.  

I long to chase the sun again.  To feel the waters of the creek rush over my feet and the natural air fill my lungs.  I long for a freedom.  

So many emotions fill my very being.  Anger, betrayal, compassion, depression, concern, and empathy to name a few.  I need some time in nature to get my bearings, to find my anchor, to sort out my feelings.  I need a moment to step back and look around.  Plunged deep in the waters of the unknown, the uncertainty and emotion, I can’t take a breath.  

Life has always seemed to change in an instant, has it really?  Small changes occurring everyday, the a major shift maybe?  Now left to figure out the here and now, keep hope alive and try to keep on living.  I don’t know, take it one day at a time, each tiny step and see where it ends up.